Bali Diaries: Part 2 - Roots of culture

I was going through fb:s group for this local community in here and something in there caught my attention: There was a post where they were discussing about the foreigners who come here to Bali and want to live here permanently and there was a guy who came from the west and explained that it’s very hard to start anything legal here because the systems and laws are so complicated that it’s very hard for an outsider to grasp and then some local persons answer was that if the country and it’s customs do not please then please leave. You can see why the conversation didn’t seem to go anywhere. It seemed to me that that they were talking about completely different things. Other one was talking about many people wanting to stay in Bali and work and start businesses legally but find it too hard and give up eventually after maybe years of trial and error. The local man saw this as an attack against his culture and nation and started defending aggressively saying that those who want to live here must adjust to local society or basically get the fuck out. 

I saw also in some news that there was a situation in Denmark where some extremists were demanding that the local must change their values because they are simply wrong in their point of view.

I don’t want to get involved in any way to the debate of who should change their culture and who just adjust to what because I feel myself a bit of a stranger in any culture including “my own”. Some I can understand more easily than others because of my conditioning but I do not hold so firm belief as somebody coming from any specific culture. My feeling about it is that wherever I find myself in I’m in a way a guest passing through. I find it fun to observe any collective habits that people hold so dear. I mean it’s a wonderful play of diversity and contrast that is not in the end in anyway contradicting any other habits or beliefs that people lead their lives by. 

Now we must dive a little bit under the surface. I recall Terrence McKenna calling culture an operating system, just like in a computer you have a certain operating system that needs an update every now and then to keep up with the new technological inventions and all other variables, and that is what the human operating system truly is. It is a given set of beliefs and values that at the same time help us to operate very effectively in a one-minded state but when taken (as it has been) as an identity it leads into a funny situation that we often do things just because that’s the way it has been before instead of being fresh and seeing what would work the best at these given circumstances. So therefore we will have opposing habitual and unquestioned beliefs coming together where any sort of real meeting is not possible as human beings because we as people fail to see ourselves as anything other than our automatic and very robot-like reactions that are predetermined and coded in our system from very young age. Now being in that very confined space of living like a robot it feels very uncomfortable to have somebody questioning the very foundations on which the identity is built on. It starts shaking like a house of cards and when the ideals start to lose their ground then because the identity is so strong that the person cannot see himself as anything else than that conditioning they will feel as if they personally have been shaken and attacked hence the defence mechanism and closing down instead of embracing the joy of seeing the vastness of expression at display.

All cultural conflict comes from just a simple mistake that human consciousness easily makes. It’s the mistake of “I am this body, I am these thoughts and the emotions. This is my country, these are my people and my family” Instead of just the pure presence of “I am” that is unassociated with any culture or belief system seeing if something is needed but otherwise remaining empty. There is a reason for this clinging to habits. It’s very scary to stand on your own and especially not having the answers as a cane to lean on. You will feel very naked at first and a fear will arise but that is the only way to freedom. One must reclaim their own being back from merely cultural and social pre-determined behaviour. Then there is a more solid ground to stand on when a person starts to see himself as the presence instead of these patterns passed from generation to the next. Then even the culture is not a problem anymore. In fact you can have so much more fun with it because you don’t take it so seriously. You find yourself so free that you can even play along and you’ll start to see the real essence and beauty of the culture you are coming from. It’s not forced on you so you don’t have to belief in it if you don’t want to but you can even have a real pride for coming from certain background for you see the richness that it has brought to your experience. They all have wonderful creativity and beauty that is in tune with the local nature also and could not be possible in any other part of the earth. But still you see without a doubt that this is not all of you, it merely touches the surface of you. You cannot be confined in such a small category as culture and suddenly respectability doesn’t seem so appealing as before. You can go a little crazy and you can even make fun of your culture. It will not be such a big deal anymore and others making fun of your culture don’t look like attacks anymore.

I would never, just for example turn into a Balinese even if I tried my absolute best for the rest of my life to adjust and learn. I would always have my roots in Finland for my body, my nervous system, my mind has been growing in a different atmosphere even though it will adjust in time but I’m still always a guest on this earth and I can respect that any culture and people living in it have their own ways but I’m not so interested in people who carry their culture around as something more than a fun play. It gets too heavy after a while. I always find myself more attracted towards those who have gone beyond that. Who I can truly meet as something more than a product of their heritage and upbringing. Freedom in me greets the freedom in anyone who has got it. I will automatically find it more appealing and I feel more spaciousness and connectedness around those people. People who do not look me just as my appearance as my human self.

Let’s meet as presence.

I’m going to say it.. I usually don’t but…. oh, god.. here it goes:

-Namaste

Bali Diaries: part 1 - Fight within and diseases

I’m here in Bali. Writing this from my balcony by the riverside. It’s a real paradise but I have been feeling quite weak ever since I traveled here. (almost exactly 1 week ago) I seem to have energy only in short periods and after that I get flu-like symptoms and have to rest for most of the day in my air conditioned house. I had a period for about 1 day that I felt I was getting back to normal.. but nope, I’m even more tired now than before. 

I noticed from the period of having my strength back for a while that I felt like I was lost. I felt like I didn’t know what to do and actually I felt a little guilty not doing anything as one “should” do in a place like this.. There is simply so much possibilities. 

I went yesterday to the rice fields for a lunch and stayed in shadow like I have stayed this whole time. I haven’t really been into trying to get tan because I’m in here for almost 3 months so I don’t have any rush to get tanned to get people in Scandinavia envious. In the restaurant I saw a girl traveling clearly for a shorter holiday in Bali. My impression of her was fairly typical tourist impression. She seemed stressed in her appearance and she was fire-department-red for staying too long in the sun and yet she chose the place in the sun in her black top and shorts at the hottest time of the day and ordered a drink with ginger. I thought just “Wow.. that’s something..” She took out both her iPhone and iPad and started taking pictures of the surroundings, the foods and drinks that came to her. (probably face booking them too) It was just very interesting to watch somehow. It seemed like she was out on a power holiday to see and experience everything so at least she has some good stories to tell when she’s not here anymore and a skin cancer to remind her in her old days that she went to places. I imagine her getting a real nice photo-collection and saying to everyone who would ask “You have to experience bali at least once in your life!”. I giggle inside myself a little because I think I have used that phrase on someone and I have traveled also in this manner before.

Now it’s funny to see the contrast between the enthusiasm and sense of adventure that I have had before compared to now when I really just came to live here for a while and enjoy slow pace of life. It’s not just the outer travel that has calmed down recently but also the inner travel is not so extreme and crazy now. The addiction and thrill of energetic/spiritual experiences/knowledge and whatever interesting phenomena I have encountered on my way seems to be becoming more and more secondary. That’s why for me Ubud is the most interesting place to be for me at the moment. I can go to public sauna on the rice fields where all the new-ageys come after their hard day of yoga, crystal awakening ascension workshops or whatever they have. I went to the sauna few days ago and I went quite early so it wasn’t too crowded. It stated very clearly on the door “SILENCE!!!” and It felt such a nice place to be not having to talk to anyone and everyone was silent. Then in comes one yogi -girl who starts chanting very loudly and passionately “OM GAM GANAPATAYE NAMAHA!.” and another girl joins her as I’m going silently “Really? I mean Really?!..” Until a guy comes in very politely saying “Please, this is a silent are, you can sing beautiful songs but please do it outside, it’s a silent area.” Then they eventually stop clearly disappointed and one of the girl answers -Well, doesn’t the music also come from a space of silence” That’s when I felt like I must be in one of J P Sears’ videos and I felt that I could not decide what my reaction could be.. I felt like laughing and crying at the same time but mostly It was the ultimate moment of exhaustive sigh and a facepalm. I Could feel the same feelings of disbelief coming from the guy but he just clearly stated “No, We will not discuss philosophy about it.”

Why I mentioned that it’s probably the most interesting place for me is because I recognise myself in each of these characters and I do have compassion for it. I can see myself few years ago in both inner and outer travellers which doesn’t make a great difference in the end for both are in stress to find something to report and say “I found happiness and fulfilment here, I don’t feel separate anymore, I can finally accept myself”.

I started out talking about my body and how it doesn’t feel fully functional yet. I see that it’s actually very much needed just for myself to have an excuse to be still and relax, not to try to accomplish something. I am, I exist, I am here and now and there is nothing to do, there are no goals unless I choose so. Sometimes I just tend to forget that and start forcing myself and neglecting my true feelings. I’m actually quite content just going out couple of times per day to eat something good or have a nice massage. Yesterday I even got my first facial ever. Life is very simple at the moment and I needed physical weakness to allow myself not to feel bad about not doing much.

-See ya’ll later, Warm greetings from the Tropic.

My terrace -Ubud